So, tell me
How are your wife and kids?
Oh, I thought you had some
I could've swore you did
You know
It’s getting pretty late in the game
Don’t you think it’s high time
To make a change?
Man, if I wanted your unsolicited advice
If I want to do things and pay for them twice
If I need a dark take on my life
I’ll come to you
Yeah, we used to drink
And we used to scheme
12 years later
You’re still doing the same
You could’ve made
A 30 under 30 list by now
I think I’ve got a guy
That can help you out
Man, if I wanted your unsolicited advice
If I want to do things and pay for them twice
If I need a dark take on my life
I’ll come to you
You're the jack of all trades
And a master of none
Those millennial critiques
Are a bit overdone
Maybe we’ll buy up some stock
In the next generation
Cuz if the Tide Pod Challenge
Is any indication
You got a little older
And now it seems
You no longer dream
You just fall asleep
Oh and ambition sank so long ago
Passions are numb
Desire’s burning low
Man
If I wanted your unsolicited advice
If I want to finally take things
Under the knife
If I need a hot take
If I need a think piece
If I need a remake
Of every movie now
If I ever want a single thing you’ve got
If I’m ever lost in that old school of thought
If I ever find myself quite so distraught
I’ll come to you