"humanity takes itself too seriously, it's the world's original sin.."
G-d peeled heaven away from earth so pleased was he, he got a chill in his spine and shook like a tree. the leaves shook too but with the rage of pride, the rage of pride. one leaf named satan yearned to be bigger than the tree, so g-d flicked him off, flicked him off. on the way down he caught a severe nasal retention and there he lingered on the verge of a spasm called a sneeze, the torture was called hell, reserved for satan and his devils, never to hear the words, "g-d bless you" again.
He called the mark of the sun on the moon - light, he said, "good" and shut the light out to form the dark. he saw that dark and loneliness breeds artistic ease and let the water spill through his fingers to form the firmament. he sketched the earths depths with the winding currents, let the moons passivity have its will with the wishy washy tides.
But first i think by now, somewhere on the sixth? day, that creeping things, for lack of a better phrase, sprang from the ground, and the image of g-d was worthy of himself, he said, let's make man in my image.
So g-d createdman a penis with a bone inside. the king james version calls it a rib. one night a pain shot through this bone, while he slept, he woke up no longer erect, the bone removed, while he slept to form a lovely woman who wept.
Man climbed on top of a cherry tree with his face towards a cluster looking down at her, one by one piercing the skin, yielding the juice rolling down the branches, letting his mind meander in erotic metaphore - this sensation was called "lust" and man basked in its promising fluid.