Bill Jackson was a poor old dub,
Who joined the Darktown Poker Club
But cursed the day he told them he would join.
His money used to go like it had wings
If he held Queens, someone had Kings
And each night he would contribute all his coins.
He said I'm going to play em tight tonight
No bobtail flush is gonna make me bite
When I get's in, my hands going to be a peach.
So he played em tight, but lost his pile
And Bill got peevish after a while
So he rose, got up, and made this speech.
He said - Now you all see this brand new razor
I've had it sharpened just today
And I'm comin''- in with my own rules
That you must follow as you play.
Now keep them boney hands on the table when you deal'em please
And don't be slipp'en any aces down there in between your knees.
And don't make any of them funny signs like your trying to tip off your hand
Just talk in American, boy American - so's I can understand.
And don't be dealing off the bottom, cause Oh! that's rough
Just take Five, Five - then stop, that's enough.
Now when you bet, put up them chips, cause I don't like it when you shy.
If you get busted - go get some, cause I won't be here by & by.
Pass them cards for me to shuffle every time before you deal
Then if anything wrong, I must see.
Cause you ain't going to play this game according to Mr. Hoyle,
You're going to play this here game according to me.